last night

living in perlis for 4 years now, i must say we don't really have decent fast food chains to go and explore the menus. we don't even have Mc Donals here. there are only 3 KFCs restaurants in perlis. ohh wait maybe 4. the nearest to what a normal KFC restaurants is called MY FC. and it tastes...well, u should try it to judge it. i've tried MY FC once and never returned ever since. what a joke!

oh, recently there's secret recipe restaurant opened in kangar. and i guess it's the only decent place for me and hubs to go out on our date night once a week. i bet the tauke has already familiar with us by now. since that's the only "decent" place for us to spend time with, i think i have eaten too many cakes nowadays.seriously, i have turned myself into a CAKE ADDICT. i may not have all the pictures to prove cos if i do, i think people might freak out to see how many pieces of cakes i have sinfully indulged myself in. ohh well, the waist line might be a good proof. ehehhe...nak kurus??? lupakan la seketika..

last night i had this pulak... White Chocolate Macadamia. i spent a very long time scanning the cake's caunter. because? ya la..rasanya almost each cake dah pernah try..hahahah...that's very bad ok.


i think this cake hit me at the right spot. oohh~ SODAP! not too sweet & not muak..just perfect.

as if the cake is not satisfiying enough, so i opt for this Chicken Cornish. taste just like a pie. with shreaded chicked,carrots,raisin, pastu lagi apa tah, cooked in special sauce.hmm...ok, not bad boleh tahan. there are 2 types of cornishes. original and spicy - and it's BIG. i love the original taste. :)

so, just to give my perspective of perlis, i think the perlis people should demand more developments. a lot of things are either can't be found in perlis or (VERY) limited number in perlis. kesian...i demand more fast food chains pehhhleaseee...ohh, if possible low calories. ada kah?? i mean boleh kahhh? ;p

what to do..i'm hungry all the time...

sinful indulgence...

i lost 1kg. i just lost 1000Grams alrite!! so i celebrate my achievement with a piece of Vienna Brownie last nite at secret recipe... *so happy*

p.s. i might have gained 2kg today... no courage to step on the scale!

p.p.s. apparently, that was not the only thing i had last nite...

~yummehh~

Penangan urutan Mak Nani & air jamunya

so i went back to penang last weekend for the 2 days weekend break. the motive of going back this time around aside from visiting friends and doing a bit shopping was to actually going for a tradional body massage. well, to be honest, i didn't feel so well for the past 3 weeks or so after the miscarriage. i didn't really had a strict berpantang since i was feeling ok right after a week the of the miscarriage. little that i know, because of my don't-really-give-a-damn-attitide, it finally took a toll on me. i mention i had gain weight in my previous entries right??? there you go, i finally figured out the cause. BADAN SUDAH MASUK HANGIN!

i was feeling bloated,my legs cramped a few times, not to mention the uncomfortable feelings inside my tummy, also the lower tummy (ari2) felt VERY uncomfortable for the past 3 weeks. i didn't really understood why i was feeling such way. i couldn't explain to my mak how i felt. so i consult a friend and she suggested the traditional body massage from experience mak bidan kampung. and luckily back inpenang i have a friend who always told me stories about her mak bidan from indonesia named Mak Nani. she has been massging my bestie and a few other friends from the start. before she was pregnant, while pregnant and after delivery. the reviews were so freaking great. they said mak nani punya penangan memang KAW.

so i asked my mak to arrange me an appointment for me. i could tell she was an experienced bidan by the way she massage me. i felt better just after one session. i have to finish 3 sessions with her. another 1 session to go.

she was like any other bidan. very talkative,full of tips. love her indon accent! hahah...rasa macam dalam telenovela lak. she said my whole body dah masuk angin. she asked why didn't i come to her earlier? well. how should i know?? i thought i was going to be fine.. ;( my urat saraf semuanya dah keras and get this, she said batu meriyan i dah lari. WHAT??? meriammmm?? i was schocked. seriously, i had no idea what was it. rupanya she explained, it's our peranakan.hmm, i thought peranakan tu rahim kan??bukan ka rahim dok kat bawah ni?? she said the baru meriyan tu dok kat atas di tepi perut ni.right under the ribcage.huuuhhh cemana tu??

so she fixed it.Alhamdulillah, i feel a lot better.it's just that i need to start berpantang balik since badan penuh angin kus kus...heheh..

she even prepared me 2 kinds of air jamu to bring back. at first, of couse i was reluctant. i never drink jamu before. i only take vitamins but not consistentlay. but Mak Nani convinved me to drink her homemade jamu. terkejut ok! it tasted good! i always thought this kind of jamu would be very bitter and smell unpleasant. again, i was so wrong. the jamu was her secret recipe she said. some of the ingredients could only be found in her hometown Medan, Indonesia. so i tried. taste?? sweet, mildly sour, herbal-like. it's liquid jamu. bukan pil or paste like. okay la...not bad. i can handle it.

she gave me very informative tips:

-avoid sour foods

-spicy foods

-soak my feet in warm water

-avoid ice or cold drinks completely from now on. ( OH NO)

and a lot more. which i forgot...adoi! i need to ask her again this weekend.

she said this is to make sure i could easily concieve again, insyaAllah. BUT most importantly, doa to Allah. she said, by the look on my feet, i'm the type of person who would have an easy delelivery/birthing. insyaAllah, amin..i hope so.

she also mention about not giving up on trying for a baby. always be positive and usaha tanpa jemu. Mak Nani kata if we have been married for a year or two, still no signs of getting pregnant, don't waste time waiting. USAHA. maybe batu meriyan dah all over the place. only a proper massage could put it back to its original place. and, kalau bidan and pesakit tak dapat rasa denyutan nadi di tengah2 pusat while massaging tu, it's not a good sign.dia kata, jauhkan lah perkara macam tu. sebab the chances of getting pregnant would be almost zero. BUT,again ALLAH MAHA BERKUASA. USAHA yang penting.

i leave it to Allah & tawakal for everything that He would determine to me. reading about others who are expecting and seeing others with their cute tummies, i so want that too. but i know i have to wait for some time. i am still afraid of the past experience.losing ur baby is definately a very sad experience. furthermore, like many have suggested to wait at least 6 months.

husband & wife having trouble - ALREADY?

i think i need a make over or something. my wordrobe also...since getting married, i have changed. i mean MY BODY changed. i'm still the sweet & bubbly person as always (poyo). seriously, i looked at the mirror yesterday and i was so frustrated looking at myself. i look sooo tired. i'm getting bigger too. i couldn't sqeeze myself into my favourite pants which i could easily fit in like 4 months ago...i found myself struggling to fit into the freaking jeans. OH MY GOD!

this morning, hubs complained in front of mirror too.

the scene: i was in the other room. just woke up & in front of the mirror checking myself. hubs came rushing into the room half (ehemm) naked.

hubs: macam badak!!
me: did u just call me badak?? ( pushing his arms)
hubs: bukan2... tengok nihh! sy dah rupa badak. dulu boleh lagi tangok cermin and perut tak sebuncit ni.
me: hmm... (no comments)
hubs: ni mesti sebab dok makan malam2 ni...dah la, lepas ni tak payah la masak apa dah. kita makan roti dah..
me: amboi, baru masak 3 malam berturut la boleh sebuncit ni...hari tu tak masak, tanya masak tak? konpius...
hubs: takpa2, kita jangan makan.kita makan megi & roti.
me: baru nak ajak keluar makan kat secret recipe mlm ni.
hubs: takpa2...kita makan kek sudah...

aiyakkkkkk!!

hmm, i think, my husband has no idea what a good diet means. as far as he concerns, the dinner that makes him buncit!!

as for myself, i gained weight straight after i miscarrige. i think it's a hormonal thing that i need to pay attention to. cos i don't eat much but i still gain some weight.

ohh, i wish i could turn back the time when i was slimmer. so, from now on, i pleadge to practice a healthy diets AGAIN! hopefully, hubs learns something along the way. hard to make him understand that it's not about rice or dinner that makes him buncit...he just eats a lot if it's homecook meals!! *sigh*

p.s. i love the pic above. i think i look cute.it helps to think that i could look cute all the time, just need some adjustments..ahahhaha...

back to the reality - again!

i'm finally back to work after almost 3 weeks on MC + break. Alhamdulillah, i'm feeling healthy and like my old self all over again. ;) coming back to work was the least favourite thing after a long break i guess, i expected things at the office and my classes will be all over the place and in a big mess/chaos/uncontrolled. but to my surprise, actually everything is ok and in order. i don't have to do any replacement with my classes since i was on leave, we have 2 new lecturers who took over my classes. syukur, kalau tak, lebih dari 20 jam nak buat kelas ganti...PENGSAN!

i think i had a good rest in penang since i have gained back all the weight that i've lost during my pregnancy. now, i look chubby..i mean, fat! hahah..hubs even made a silly comment that i looked like "cikgu ragby" hampeh betul...fine, i'm fat! i need to slim down soon. i wish it would be as simple as i said it...huwaaaaa! ;( mampu kahhh??

ohh, entering my office last monday wasn't that simple too, i got a lot of " norr, so sorry of what happenned...hope to hear another good news soon ya! cuba lagi..." from almost everybody.

ALAMAK!

well, let's hope that the "soon" is not next month ok! heheh...i'm still recovering and still gaining back the strenght to actually persuade myself into thinking positively. i must say that after the miscarriage, i'm feeling very afraid. i'm afraid that the next pregnancy, the same thing will reoccure and i would have to go through the same grief which i really cannot handle.

nowadays, my tummy feels so empty. kinda miss the feeling of knowing that i was carrying the bundle of joy inside. :) that time, perut rasa cekang ja..very uncomfortable, strangely, i miss that!

should i try soon?? well, i hope that one fine day, i would wake up and i'm actually pregnant again and keep my finggers crossed that the next time, things will be better, baby will be as strong as badang (huyoo badang tu!) ;) and i could go though it successfully like any normal woman. amin.

hell yeah, i wish i could be pregnant as soon as tomorrow..hahaha..but, maybe the appropriate thing to do is to give it some time...let the uterus heal gorgeously first! ;p hopefully, Allah will help me again the second time. Amin...

“Wahai Tuhanku! Kurniakanlah kepadaku dari sisi-Mu zuriat keturunan yang baik. Sesungguhnya Engkau sentiasa Mendengar (menerima) doa.” ayat 38, surah Ali-Imran

few pages from our wedding album

i know i haven't been updating much about my wedding...truthfully, i was lazy & i didn't really know where to start,plus i was damn busy with work straight away after i got married. i never really had a long break for my wedding. just a few days off.

i guess since my wedding album has finally done, so maybe i should share a few pages from my album. so here they goes...(randomly picked ja ni ok,main upload ja)






























i had the best moments in life during the photo shoot sessions. i had a great respect to my OP nasir zin & his team. they made us feel very comfortable n it was joy and full of laugh all the way. tell u, these people are crazy! kelakar tak hingat. ohh, of course amat2 memenatkan and i remeber my legs were soar up to a point couldn't bare to stand anymore...penant gila..still they would keep shooting and shooting, trying to find best angles..tegolek2 atas lantai hotel, panjat merata alam..BEST SANGAT! semua kepenatan seemed all worthwhile. tak tau nak explain cemana dah..these guys are the best..

and for me, the only memory we have after the wedding is the Album, so it's better for us to invest a little bit on professional photographers. they'll make us look great despite all the circumstanses..contohnya, suami anda tidak reti posing... heheh


CREDITS:

~Nasirzin.com
abg. nasir
abg harilfani
abg. matnuat

~Sunway Hotel, Seberang Jaya, Penang



ohh anyway, click the pics for better view. ;p

where the heck have i been???

Salam...
not sure whether i have people visiting this blog anymore or not...i have been very very quite since the last entry. well, as the matter of fact, i didn't even check my blog at all. BUSY?? nehhh...
life has been tremendoulsly great and full of blessing since we have been married. syukur Alhamdululillah...i coulnd't be more happier. ;)

a lot had been saying, when a person gets married, the rezeki from Allah will be opened as wide as the sky...and it was and is very true indeed. mr. hubster and i could feel the rahmat Allah since we tied the knot! ;) life has been very very peaceful and with the amount of rezeki that granted, we couldn't thank the Power above more..

well, the biggest rezeki of all - last november, i recieved a very happy news after a visit to a clinic... that i was 5 weeks pregnant. well, after a month of getting married, maybe this was what expected laa kan? heheh..

i was shocked & didn't expect that at all...cos i was having light spotting on the day i was supposed to get my period. the long awaited period never came but only light spotting for almost 12 days and i was nausious all the time after i ate. a short trip to a clinic confirmed the pregnancy.

bad news, because i was having spottings the doctor couldn't promise that thepregnancy would survive as she wanted to "clean" my womb. at that moment, i was so damn worried. the very next day, mr.bubster took me to the specialist. and he scanned my tummy and gave me a very positive advice from medical perspective. he said the baby sack looked great and everything was perfect and nothing to be worried about just that i should limit my movements and be very cautious all the time and i had to come for regular check up weekly cos they wanted to monitor the pregnancy. i was so damn relieved. that was the first ultrasound and for the first time the hubster and i were very happy to recieve the best news, ever - the bundle of joy is on its way! ;)

so as the week progressed, i was not feeling so well. i puked all the time. you name it - in the kitchen, in the car, in the office, in the lab & class while i was finishing my lecture. even in a plate while i was eating. without any warning signs. i was really week and there were times i couldn't get up and sleeping were the only medicine to cure the sickness.

poor hubster, he had to take over the job of a housewife. he did all the chores around the house and took great care of me.

the puch card at the office was always blank and i had to explain myself why i was always on leave or MC.

the friends from the office were stating to avoid me. i also isolated myself from the crowd because i didn't feel like talking much. i could feel a very negative energy around me as if they thought i was being lazy, and because i got pregnant, i didn't come to work. what the #*@* - i was so sad. serioulsly, a friend whom i consider a good friend was not so nice to me. i never judged her despite the fact she stabbed me from the back. i forgave her. i could feel a sense of jealosy from her. but never mind~

so as i entered the 8 weeks of my pregnancy i had to undergo the check up procedure like a normal mom-to-be. things were looking great from 2 doctors i visited. just to get 2nd opinions of my spotting condition. both said it would stop when i entered my 12 weeks of pregnancy. the ligt spotting finally stopped at 9 weeks. but the morning sickness were getting worst every day. i couldn't eat. i lost 3 kg in a week. people started to notice that i was losing weight fast. i felt offended a bit. i remembered when i was excited if people said i look slimmer. but it was before i got married. but when i was pregnant, that was the last thing i wanted to hear, i guess. ;p

as i entered my 10 weeks, i was ok a bit. i could eat. and all i did was eating to gain back my weight. for the whole of the week i was eating and eating. ... finally~

but last tuesday, i woke up to have my shower, i notice the spotting was back and it was almost black in color but i didn't feel any pain. i freaked out a bit.

at noon, the hubster came home to take me to our OBGYN, and he scanned my tummy and i was so worried i even closed my eyes. i didn't want to see it. then he calmly said that the baby is gone. and i was misscarried at 11 weeks almost approahing 12 weeks in a few more days..

i was numbed. i couldn't think straight and mr. hubster did all the talking and the decision of what most appropriate. which was to undergo the D&C procedure.

we checked ourseleves in at Putra Medical Center at 3 pm and i was brought to the labor room. the next thing i knew, everything was done. i woke up at almost 10 pm.. i was having a bit of complication at first as my womb was tightly closed. the doctor had to insert some sort of medication to soften the womb and 2 hours later i was in so much pain. it was horrible feelings and mr. hubster was there the whole time comforting me. after maghrib the doctor came to finish the business. i passed out during the procedure. Alhamdulillah, everything is okay now.

i'm in my home sweet home penang now - resting and recovering. i will start teaching again after CNY. i accept my loss and redha with what Allah has determined to me. i feel so bless of having a great family and a few great friends whom i love and treasure. and the best husband ever! this experience has been the biggest so far and i hope the rahmat Allah will come our way again. amin..

as for now, i just want to focus on being a good wife to him as i never got the chance to ever since i got pregnant. so now, it's time to give the hubster more attention and love like he always deserves!~

life's great! Alhamdulillah...