Before i bid goodbye to 2012, i guess it is much appropriate for me to do a little "flash back" and conclude my 2012 so whenever i get old later ( ok now pon dah old. ntah apa2) i could read my blog and reminiscence of the previous years.hahaha...
Beginning of 2012 As A Mother!
i was still struggling with new life of becoming a mom of my sweet potato pie and literally had no idea what to expect and planned to just go with the flow. we brought back Maryam to our home in Perlis after i finished my maternity leave and started to work. boy.... how hard was it being a first time mom and did things for the first time with an infant. i must admit that juggling a modern life with a baby at that time was very challenging. we went through a phase where Maryam was sent to a day care center and then after she fell ill we decided to hire a baby sitter instead. changing 2 baby sitter at that time and finally found the suitable one. she was happy and healthy again.
one thing i was a bit frustrated with my Milk Pumping schedule that really gone hay wired once i started working. it was so stressful and being a lecturer which your core-business is teaching and you have other things to do at the same time, where do i find time to pump??? i basically had no time to pump. the demanding life as a working mother who happened to be an EP mom was totally not ideal for me. i decided to go for fully formula for Maryam when my EBM was running out of stock. boy.....another challenge. i thought it was gonna be simple. it didn't. we change the FM quite a few times till we found the most suitable one.
in was in February 2012 when Maryam finally had a really bad fever that she had to be admitted and we spent a week in PMC where she was dignosed with Acute Bronchitis that was quite bad. kesian sungguh... i hate that moments. moments when i felt hopeless and couldn't do much. hate it when the baby was sick. depressing feelings.
in 2012 i also learnt to prioritize things, and that work came last before family. and i would drop anything if there was a need for me to be with my baby and family. i still put family first till now though.
Being a mom is a tough job. no kidding. up until now i am still seriously thinking whether we are having another baby soon or wait 2-3 years more.
Yes. it is great being a mom. but behind the smiles and laughters, there swets and tears too. sometimes,i feel like, enough...i am done with one child only. BUT... kesian kan... Maryam loves people. she hates being alone. plays alone...just not her favorite thing. she loves being around people. and make lotsa noise. so, i guess i should be pregnant again. When?? it is still undecided. if you ask my husband, he'll say 2013.InshaAllah if there is rezeki.
2012 : A Wife & Worker!
i decided to to apply for a transfer from the Perlis to Penang. it was not because i hate Perlis. It was simply because i often found myself feeling not satisfy with the enviroment at the work place. too much negativity. after 5 years being there, i told my husband that i need a new enviroment which could boost my motivation up. Alhamdulillah, i am much much happier a new work place now. i learn a whole lot of new stuffs which i never had when i was in Perlis. i must say that i feel much appreciated here and more optimistic here and my perspective towards my job is much more positive. Well, waking up to work still feels sucks though. hahaha...
But being more positive at work came with a price. it is more than 6 months already that me and my husband have been living a-not-so-long-distance-relationship. hehehe... (ok not funny, why i laugh??) Rizal is still in Alor Star unfortunately still waiting to be transfered to Penang. but nowadays he basically travels daily Penang-Alor Star as compared to previously where we only met on weekends. Now, we are much happier although much tiring for him. i am so thankful that he is willing to sacrifice this for us. money and energy. We're hopeful that 2013 will bring more luck that he would be transfered nearer soon. *keep my finggers crossed*
As a wife, i think in 2012 i have been "neglected" my husband a lil' bit. maybe because i was too caught up with baby and a life after work. and been veryyyy tired to just focus on the husband much. honestly...i need to change this fast... previously 100% time was dedicated to Maryam after work. but she is getting older and i guess i could revert at least quarter or the time for my hubby this coming year. hahahha...boleh??
i am lucky to have such an understanding husband. he is very independent around the house too. so maybe because of that i didn't really pay close attention to him which i think it is not healthy in a long run.. even though he never complaints but, i pitty him laa...i need to act more like a wifey. cook him nice meals especially.
Of Hopes & Dreams In 2013!
i will enroll myself into the university again this 2013. i need to get my postgraduate degree done this year. i have been postponing it far too long already. so, InshAllah, this 2013, it is for real. USM i'm coming back!! heheh...
i cannot wait to move into our first home. our OWN HOUSE. it will be ready slightly before October 2013. that gives me plenty of time to start planning what to do with the house later. especially getting myself a dream kitchen! hahaha..funny i don't cook but i dream of a good looking kitchen. hehhhh~
i hope to send Maryam to play school for a few hours. exposing her to new things and to socialize with friends of her age. but i still have not found any suitable play school yet.
in terms of career, i think 2013, it is the right time to focus on getting a promotion.Try to write and present papers. getting into research mode and things like that...a load of works i tell ya'... i might sink if don't swim... ;)) so proper planning should begin as soon as possible. i mean now.
Possibilities Of Being Pregnant Again!
if i ask myself like seriously... i think i am just not ready to go through it yet. at least for another year resting then maybe i think i will be ready into a baby mode again. hahaha... but, i am not rejecting the possiblities that i might become a pregger again this 2013. after all the biological clock is ticking... hehhh!
Turning The Big 3-0 In 2013!
hooo my goodness... kinda scary to be 30 soon. like in my case. it's happening on January. ahhahaha... tua la kan??
But hey, i read somewhere that for a woman, 30 is a great age whereby your skin is glower, your body is much hotter... so, no need to feel so down ladies..hahahhaha... i hope the statement will apply to me too... HOPEFULLY....
So, with that, i shall say....
HAPPY 2013 EVERYBODY~ Let's be more optimistic for the coming year... work hard,play hard and shop even harder! LOL..
ohh, don't forget to PRAY harder to Allah as well.