Masuk Keluar Kelas pun bermula lagi

welcome new semester for all polytechnics in Malaysia...

long hitus!

and i am back!! hahahha... macam laa ramai sangat baca blog hang norr oii... 

Well, i just did some "renovation" to this blog sebab dah bertahun layout yang sama. zaman tak kawen, dah kawen dan beranak....sama saja.

now, kasi improvement skit for the look...content tak tau laa ada improvement or not after this....cam sama ja...balik-balik cita tentang si Maryam..heheheh...

Anyways, i have nothing much to write just to say HELLO to the blogging world as i have been on a long hiatus for quite sometime...atas dasar kasihan kat blog ni,macam hidup segan mati tak mahu pulak sejak dua menjak tuan tanah tak dak idea nak tulih apa. hehhh...so tulis laa sepatah dua kata skit rasanya.

what am i currently been up to these days?? aside from endless workload, i am currently actively trying my best to lose weight.seriously. i mean i cannot be walking around with a plus size clothing anymore...i hate it and i want to be healthy and strong and active for my very active girl, Maryam too. i need to keep up with her running and jumping around.

 i am ashamed of being  fat and i am tired of being overweight already! seriously. i think i am doing this for myself basically. i am so lucky that my husband has never asked me to reduce my weight as he thinks i am just perfect the way i am and he actually assured me that.. but, i have been gaining too much weight since pregnancy and post pregnancy...so, if i want to be pregnant again the next time, i think i better loose the weight first. i don't want to be pregnant fat. that's all. i think it is not healthy and definitely not cute... sorry, that's my opinion. ;) so peace...no hard feeling please.

ok enough 'bout the fatty me. on the other note, i am a lil' bit busy with this

application for post-graduate studies.

i have a few dreams in my life, and this particular one has been slipping away a few times already. i cannot let it slip again this time. you know, to continue my studies at this time with a growing up child, i have a lot to think and to sacrifice. but, if others can do, why can't i? so, all i need is to be positive and remind myself to stay positive all the time as the road to this particular dream is not going to be easy. and i know it will be all worthwhile, Insyaa Allah.

if i ada post graduate degree pun it would not guarantee me a high position or stuff like that. this is just for my own satisfaction and for my child to have a person who she could at least look up to one day hopefully.

and i have to make sure that while i am busy juggling my work and my studies, Maryam would still be the  first priority and family comes first before anything else. so, dear God please help me with this. Ameeen.

sekali sekala pegi belajar balik akan buka lebih luas pemandangan kita kan. our Prophet pun encourage us to never stop learning until the end.

WE ARE IN PENANG & MARYAM TURNS 8 MONTHS

ASSALAMUALAIKUM

if anybody notices all my previous entries were nothing but consist of WORDLESS WEDNESDAY or just a simple sentence and that was all. the best i could do with this dear blog. well, i hope it clearly pictures how busy i was juggling too many things all at the same freaking time! *phew* seriously i was busy with too many things a few months back. busy with moving out, moving in and work commitments and balancing everything. i really wanted to write, in fact there are a few things i wanted to record here but i guess i was too busy (kalah YB pulak).

For a start, HEY I AM FINALLY BACK IN PENANG FOR GOOD! syukur Alhamdulillah, after almost 6 years of staying and working in Perlis, i managed to  "meloloskan diri" hahahha... i never expected when i filled up the transfer form i would get the transfer just like that! huhh...menggelabahh laa kami anak beranak... because my husband never prepared to be transfered yet, currently just Maryam and myself sahaja berpindah ke Penang while he is still waiting to join us two hopefully after raya. *keep my fingres crossed*

ONLY GOD KNOWS HOW STRESSFUL I AM BEING AWAY FROM THE HUBS OKAY...! aduh... it really hards..that's all i could conclude. i am not gonna elaborate anymore..too depressing.

But, this is the decision i had made after i gave birth to maryam, i told myself  that i had enough of Perlis and everything about it. hahaha...macam teruk ja bunyi kan? Well, i do firmly believe that in order to move up, you just need to move out. ESPECIALLY when u have no job satisfaction at your old place anymore. i felt that i was becoming a dinosour there. and i hate the fact  i would remain stupid forever if i didn't make a move to change ... the enviroment there was not right for me anymore. i have my own ambition, vision and mission.Again, i don't want to be a dinasour!

How about the new place?? have i found my job satisfaction here?? well, for a start all i could say it;s a refreshing experience here...new working enviroment, new collegues, new perspectives and new working culture. i am loving the differences already... because i am apart of a team that is soooo well-organised and i have no opportunity to being unorganised anymore.hahahah...dalam maksud tuhh!! basically, i fit well at my new place. people are so helpful and great teamwork from top to bottom. and i also feel i need to perform here which i never felt at the old place.

Alhamdulillah....but there is no such thing as a perfect organisation and i am fully aware of that. so i don't expect much just a new place to start and grow again. hopefully, i could contribute something here.

enough about work. now..family... *sigh* where do i begin?? hari-hari rindu sama suami oi~ walaupun dekat saja still, we are not seeing each other every day. it broke my heart to see Maryam was not her usual self when we first moved here. she was very quiet and not enjoying herself. and that was enough for me to broke into tears for a few days after we arrived. i could sense that my baby was feeling down  without her daddy to play every night like it used to...but baby are well adapted human i guess...slowly and gradually Maryam could accept this changes and she's doing ok now. after all she's turning 8 months tomorrow... big girl now..

oh my goodness, she is soooo active and loves being independant. belagak macam dia tu budak besar ja gaya...she wants to break free...tawaf satu rumah sambil beguling2. and she would be under the table or the bed kalau nak cari dia sekarang sebab tu memang tempat lepak dia...hahahah... macam2 hal la sebab makin aktif and makin suka bermain.

she's 8 months tomorrow...and i just want to stop the time from flying so fast...boleh?? sometime i miss her being a newborn. haihhh...the next thing i know it is time for her to go to school already....cepat sungguh masa Ya Allah.

she has 2 teeth now!

what's new in term of her development ya? hm...i am so thankful that she's healthy. heathier than she's ever been before since we got here. Alhamdulillah... she's very active, so clever in her own way and loves foods. ;) 

i guess i can safely say that at her 7 months of age she manages to eat almost what a 7 months old infant could eat. i found that the websites and baby food groups on FB really help me so much in term of preparing her nutritious foods and homemade. i am so pround to say that until now she eats everything homemade including her biscuits. all made from scratch laa by mom. *wink* except on certain occasion i do let her take some baby bites on the counter like the teething biscuits and such. kadang i tak sempat beli buah or while travelling far i would let her eat the ready made snacks. in term of her staple, i do prepare it myself or my mother would help no matetr how far we travel bubur+puree all are homemade. i really make sure of that.

always munching~

jalan2 pun mesti nak mengunyah juga mulut tu

okay, i think i can be at peace now for writing something after soooooo damn long of being quiet from the blogging world... trust me, i am very busy woman once i strat teaching. everything is moving so fast in Penang as compared while we were in Perlis. hahahah.... (busy la sangaaatttt)

till i write again.. much love from me and Maryam Bahyraa all the way from Penang.

ohh, my baby Maryam,..happy 8 months old tommorow...mommy love you and daddy too..

Maryam & Mom

36 weeks pregnant is equal to 9 months. (status terkini)

Assalamualaikum. ( baru perasaan i had never given a salam in my previous entries. hehe)

i am currently at my  week 36 of pregnancy and many have said that looking at my condition it might not be long anymore. alamak...when everybody seems to say the same thing it makes me believe that i may be given birth anytime soon. the power of psychology i guess.

because i believe i might be going to labour soon, nowadays i have been getting some weird feelings as if Braxton Hicks or maybe false contractions or maybe that's what i believe, i dunno.. but senang cakap, i dah start rasa sakit-sakit sikit. maybe it was nothing, just a normal feelings / discomforts that a pregnant woman might feel, again i dunno... i am just hoping that if it's really the time to go to labour, at least ada tanda yang sangat jelas like bloody show, of water bag pecah or anything clear for me to head to the hospital immidiately. cos i really don't know what it feels like when u are about to give birth. setakat yang boleh ditahan, i think i tahan saja laa...i have an appointment with my doctor this coming weekend, and i am a bit nervous just in case this time punya visit i kena beranak dah...huuuu...takotnya!!

i guess i am being denial that soon i will have a baby kot? i tend not to think much what's gonna happen when the baby arrives. how my life would tremendously change in every single way soon. i am not being negative at all, ok. in fact, i am very excited to be a mother. it's just that i still cannot believe that i am going to be a parent real soon. cemana la ekk?? i have seen how happy other bloggers telling their stories about their birth experiences. some are really enjoying to read and some are a bit scary for me. i would find myself in tears everytime i read those kind of stories, seriously! walaupun kadang2 cita depa semua cam lawak or biasa saja, or memang betul punya tragik, still semua birthing stories bloggers yang i baca smua bagi i touching laa... and at one point ada jugak yang bagi kuat semangat diri seniri jugak. ;) buat rasa tak sabarnya nk beranak! hahaha..

so, as for the current updates of my situasion nowadays, i guess i am still busy with my work. i have about 110 anwer scripts to be marked starting today,prepare the students' marks, key in the marks in poly system, prepare reports and a few others before the end of next week. *PHEW*

students answers scripts - kena ada mood baru boleh mark. if not, abeh laa markah budak2 ni.

oh yes, i have taken the borang cuti bersalin lebih awal last tuesday at our admind here, and tomorrow i will submit it. as government servant, we are allowed to take 2 weeks early this kind of cuti before the actual EDD. so what the heck, rugi lak tak amik kan. at least i can rest at home. just in case, in 2 weeks time i am still not giving birth, i will proceed with my annual leave which i have approximately 14 days left. banyak kan cuti i? ehehehe... tak larat dah i nak panjat tangga opis pi mai pi mai, tu i nak cuti.  

borang kerajaan ni memang selalu confusing nk isi - banyak ayat2 yang pelik & isi benda yang sama 2-3 kali. aiyakkk!

My Ketua Program pun awal pagi tadi nampak ja muka i terus tanya "LAA ADA LAGI KA? TAK CUTI2 LAGI?" nampak sangat i patut cuti kan~hahaha... mana tak nya, jalan pun dah senget2. not only that, solat pun bila tahiyat akhir kadang sampai i tegolek tebalik - all because i have lost my balance, also perut makin besar! kelakar gila...tepaksa la ulang balik dari rakaat pertama. mencabar sungguh! ;p

that's all i guess about my current updates at week 36.

sekian, nanti update lagi, InsyaAllah.

much love!!

baby issues

noooo...i'm not refering to me wanting to have a baby or something! no...not yet...hahah...ok, i know that this entry will cause some negatives impressions on me but i just want to let all my frustration for a minute and be done with it.

it's actually about my office mates who keeps talking about their babies every hour of EVERY FREAKING DAY!! i mean i've had enought already...penat telinga i tau. i may not understand why they keep going on about their babies cos i'm not married and i have no baby to join their chit chatting..but if every morning, the first thing that comes comes out their mouths are about how their babies do this and that, how thier babies buat perangai, menangis, laughs, do some actions stunts la, eventhough baru umur 5 bulan dah pandai cakap nak susu la..yadaaa..yadaa..yadaa..ok2..i get it..but do they have to talk about the same things about their babies all the time...throughout the day..from morning till evening?? come on...gimme a break..

i know i have a choice to just ignore their talking or chit chittng but i can't..we sit in the same partition..so i have to hear them...and sometimes i just think that this is too much, as if we have nothing else to talk about? and of couse, for somebody like me who is not yet married, i mean the only person not yet married in the partition i feel a lil' left out...sedey jugak cos i have nothing to talk about.

nevertheless, i try to understand all of them..they are young mothers and excited parent. so i may not understand completely how they feel...but honestly, some people are a lilttle over the top and pretend like they have 10 babies and talk about their miricle knowledge on babies...*sigh*

ok u might say i'm being silly or exaggerating,but honestly i have to face the baby topic every day...is it really like that?? i mean if we're married and have kids all we will be talking are about our babies??? everyday?? wow~

don't people get tired of something? how about those who have not been blessed with a child yet? tak kesian ka if they have to hear the same thing everyday from their co-worker?? and also, i feel weird when these mothers dengan selamber cakap tentang org tu or org ni dah kawen for more than a year or so, still takda anak and they seem to question why?? i mean isn't that a matter of rezeki from Allah? who are we to say this and that? i mean, they are all samart and educated people here..but sometimes, they seem to act like non.. and for them if u are married, u're supposed to be pregger as soon as possible, if u fail then, seolah2 u have problem somewhere.WHAT THE....?

ok,enough said..time to move on. l love babies...they are adorable~

p/s: i'm glad i have a blog to pour all my feelings. TQ
p.p/s: ohh, no one knows i have a blog..huhu~

happy mood~

okay, sorry if i tersasar dari landasan di entry ini..ehhehe...after days of trying to log on to my blog, today at 3.30 pm i finally managed to log. tense gila la tak dapat buka blog..cos i thought our office has completely blocked the access to blogger web after the facebook is now officially blocked!! warghhhhh...napa buat macam tu?? sunyi la hidupku kini... :'( well, me and my officemates tried lots of method to log in to our FB, including installing a new software to somehow unblocked the thing but a waste of time ja...sabaq ja la..wireless at our homes pun very bad..i guess this the sign to get that broadbad thing...huhh!

but nevertheless, still im happy to be able to blog again... yahoooo~ im not too far from civilization after all!

i will update soon, TQ very much for reading ( if any)

back to work

entering my office this morning with half hearted feeling...so damn tired and my body is sore all over from the activities i went through in Melaka for 5 days...as i approached my desk i saw a stack of my student's assignments and 7 envolopes contained their final test paper... *sigh* honestly,at this very moment i have no heart to even count the papers... i couldn't care less! my heart is at my hometown...my mak called me yesterday saying that she wanted to go to market on her own to buy stuffs for the raya haji...sedih lak when she said that...
so i took the leave form and filled it up the first thing in the morning and gave it to my boss...luckily i managed to stop her just in time cos she was rushing to a meeting with our director...she said "approved!" alhamdulillah...

so today, after the invigilation at the hall [well, im a good lecturer (heheh) i always make sure i attend my students' exam days (well, i worry more than them to be honest) ] i'm offfffffff to penang!! yayyyyy...it's been more than a month since i last saw my mak...and this evening if i arrive early i will get to meet my fiance since his on a short course in penang too..yipppyyyyyyy.......ok, i may be sound silly here but we haven't had a chance to meet up after the engagement day...

i miss him!

lagu Happy

this is the song i always always love to hear to overcome my monday blues....LAYAN!! (arghhhh...too many assignments to mark! i should have given less in future to reduce my burden!!)

Hatiku rasa bahagia

Pabila kau bersama

Tiada gundah gulana

Merosak hati kita
Mari kita berganding dengan tangan

Jauhkan segala peperangan

Kita cipta irama

Di dalam melodinya

Kita nyanyi bersama
Lebih baik cinta daripada benci..

Lebih baik setia dari iri hati…

Menyanyi dan menari sesuka hati…Janji kita!!…………………

Happy!!
Lebih baik cinta daripada benci..
Lebih baik setia dari iri hati…

Menyanyi dan menari sesuka hati…Janji kita!!………………….

Happy!!
Hakikat dia

sementara saja
Kembalikan ke waktunya

(by Amy Mastura)

LEGA

well, i have been worried sick through out the weekend about too many things to do but there's only little time... last week n this week are considered very hectic week for most of us... for a start we had internal audit to finish until this thursday..i'm one of the internal auditor and also auditee at the same time...memang tak adil..dh la kena pi audit jabatan lain tp at the same time i pun kena audit gak..so tension gila la..but Alhamdulillah, all my worries were a waste of my precious time!!! DUHHHH... our jabatan dh pun selesai di audit and i was so grateful i managed to handle the job that was passed to me... and i just arrived back to my office just a few minutes ago after i finished my 4 hours class i straight away went to audit our unit teknologi maklumat with another internal auditor...i was so relieved that we managed to clear our task cos i'm gonna be on leave starting this thursday...penat gila hari ni...luckily masa audit tadi diorang jamu air..hihi...thought of asking kuih raya ada lagi ka tak...

i'm so very busy with classes and it's already towards the end of semester...so definitely banyak benda nak buat...rasa tak menang tangan...datelines after datelines and piles and piles of work load...arghhhhh...doremon help!!!

yet, i consider today is quite a good day cos i thought i was gonna be in mess...but everything seems to fall into place...lega sangat!

owh,. i just check my status as pembayar PTPTN wheter i'm under their blacklister or not...i thought i am 1 of the blacklistered person apparently, I AM NOT! yayyyy... i was worried about PTPTN especially i have missed my payment quite some time...biasa lah kita ni baru ja keja lagi gaji pun bukan la banyak macam org yg keja 5 tahun ke atas kan...so kadang2 sesak jugak la...owh, i found out about the site yg nak check PTPTN ni though reading another blogger blog...we all kinda gave comments about PTPTN ni, takot if they nak pegi bercuti or honeymoon luar negar takot lak tak lepas... i must admit i'm a little over paranoid jugak..sampai tahap nak pi bkt.kayu hitam pun takot kena tahan..hihi..

LEGA sgt hari ni walaupun it's still noon but everything seems to be ok compared to my original thought..i thought my day today was gonna be lintang pukang cos i have too many things to do..but, Alhamdulillah...so far 50% of what i wanted to accomplish today dh pun selesai dgn cepatnya with the help of few individuals... to aini, thanks cos share handouts for topic terakhir budak2 final sem...n to kak yam, tq cos making the audit session easy...and handled it like a PRO!!

BUSY BUSY BUSY

busy!
busy!
busy!

quiz 2 not- done yet
final test -question - not done yet
presentation question - not done yet

SEMUA BENDA NOT DONE YET!!! UGGHHHH!

ohh,..can't wait to buy the chocolates for hantaran after work! weeeeeee.....

tq to shyam for accompany me ya!

N.O.T.H.I.N.G...

Nothing to write about, nothin' to say... i guess this blog is created out of my boredomness just to fill up my times of doing nothing...( i could be in trouble if my boss caught me doing nothing,..so it's better to be busy typing, rite?ngehehe..)

i never used of writing stuffs let alone publishing them like this but i love reading stufss...maybe i read too much (yeah rite...) and it triggers to me out of the sudden that maybe i should write also!! *tinggggg~*

so, here i go people...i'm finally typing something with no specific story to tell. but with the hope that this blog won't be silent from now on...

gosh! i'm beginning to stress out cos' from now on my mind will have to ponder over things to write since i am a blog owner....good luck to me...hiks!!

with all my love...i declare this blog is now officially open!huhu...(bayangkan tengah potong reben with people clapping hands..wahh! sungguh perasan... *grin*)